Movie Thoughts: Birds of Prey*

*I’m not writing out the rest of the title.

Holy shit, this is bad. That thought went through my head like every ten minutes while seeing this movie. It (almost) makes Suicide Squad watchable by comparison.

I spent a good amount of time on my phone checking Facebook and looking up the cast on wikipedia to see who I was looking at. It was that boring.

I was shocked to see Jurnee Smollett-Bell (Jussie Smollet’s sister) was Denise from Full House. I haven’t seen her since like 1992. She’s weak as hell here.

Margot Robbie produced this and I don’t know why. She must enjoy playing this character.

The script was fucking horrible. Horrible. Could’ve been saved by a better director or actors, but only Robbie seems to know what she’s doing here. McGregor wants to have as much fun as Robbie is but he can’t pull it off. Everyone else is way out of their element, and MEW is tragically miscast. If this was a better movie, Rosie Perez would’ve made a great Renee Montoya.

I never want to hear a word about “white male mediocrity” from the people that produced this movie.

Parasite deserved to win Best Picture at the annual corporate sales event masquerading as an award show and this deserved a shitty opening weekend.

.5/5